A man that flatters his neighbor spreads a net for his feet.
Having a right estimation of oneself is critical for success in relationships, in business and in life. It is flattery that encourages a man to think of himself more highly than he ought to think. Thus, encouraging a man to miscalculate his own skills and abilities will tend to decrease his motivation for improvement. This doesn’t happen in every case, however. A humble man may have learned to ignore flattery, refusing to take it into account in his own self-assessment. But many will listen to flattery and stumble.
Flattery comes in various forms. It may be the Christian conference speaker who softens the message a bit for popular acceptance. He backs away from a message about sin or repentance. When he speaks of faith, he directs men to self-confidence instead of God-confidence as if self is worthy to be trusted! Or he speaks of social sins without prodding the consciences of those who are sitting before him. Some employees will lavish their managers with obsequious and unnecessary honorifics in hope that they might secure a raise or a promotion. In the world of the internet, millions of people will register their support for things they don’t really care much about by toggling the “like” button on their friends’ web pages.
Flattery does not win you friends. It may return a little weak affirmation for the moment. It may even gain a politician the popular vote. But it will not get you true friendship. When your acquaintances discover the falsity of your glad-handing and pseudo-positive hype, they will usually treat you with similar superficiality.
In the transgression of an evil man there is a snare; but the righteous do sing and rejoice.
Sin curtails freedom. It burdens the conscience, and one sin usually leads to other sins. When a man gives way to the sin of drunkenness, he opens himself up to other sins like anger, lust, and lying. With each new sin introduced into his life, he builds another wall to keep himself in the way of sin and destruction.
Sin is also addictive. Some studies have indicated that pornography is more addictive than cocaine, and its ruinous effects on marriage and the family are legendary. The burden of all the social sins, destructive habits, and ruined relationships is evident in the psychological pathologies of the modern day. Between 1996 and 2006, the use of psychotropic drugs and anti-depressants increased by 200% among adults sixty-five and older.
Meanwhile, the righteous man sings and rejoices. It is not that he doesn’t face his own trials, discouragements, and temptations. But his heart is still free to rejoice in faith that his sins are forgiven and he is accepted with God. He enjoys the freedom that comes with honest confession of his sin and sincere repentance.
It is interesting that most false religions do not emphasize singing. The Muslims generally forbid the use of music altogether. While the ungodly do sing occasionally, their repertoire is severely limited to chronicling the sad, hopeless conditions of their lives (whether it be unfaithful lovers, drunken parties, and other unfulfilled expectations). Almost without exception, the happiest families in the world are Christian families who sing the psalms and hymns in the home, in the car, and at church. They don’t need to sing the blues! They can eat their bread with rejoicing because they know that God has accepted their work (Eccl. 9:7). With full understanding that they are justified before God, received into His family, and invited to His table in communion, they can rejoice even when going through the fire of a serious trial (1 Pet. 1:6).
1. What is so dangerous about flattery? What happens to people who are led to believe they are better than they really are?
2. Why are evil men so easily ensnared in drunkenness and addictions? Why do the righteous experience the freedom to sing and rejoice?
3. Are you a happy family? Do you sing and rejoice on a fairly regular basis?